It's a long one, folks... [Posted by KyledKat on 21 Dec 2011 07:02 pm]

It's, uh, been a while, huh...? I guess I should explain.
Let me start by saying that I AM NOT looking for pity, sympathy, empathy, etc. I've come to terms with my own grievances. These have simply become experiences for me, and ones I didn't feel like putting into a forced 40-page angst-filled storyline. You, the reader, deserve better than that, and as such, I'm giving you the choice of whether or not you want to know what was happening. This is a journal-comic, after all. Sometimes more comic than journal, and sometimes vice-versa. If you really want to know, then please, read on. If not, by all means, skip it; that's why this is a comment and not a comic.


There are really two ways to look at my life (really, the way any autobiographical comic artist should look at their lives): there are the fun, perky things I feel are worth sharing, and then there are my personal problems that I don't think are appropriate to share. While they're not so much active problems anymore, and are consequently not so personal, there's still a lot more than I'm letting on. Know that I toned it down and that I'm not making mountains out of molehills here, but to put it bluntly, my life hit the shitter running (that's like four different phrases wrapped into one package right there), and in the past few months, I lost myself. I was at this point in my life: where I envisioned myself and where I was were not the same place. What it eventually culminated to what were feelings of isolation, worthlessness, hopelessness; in one word, depressed, and I'm not throwing that around lightly (like in, "OMG she didn't smile at me! Now I am depressed!").
Most days, I would wake up and not want to get out of bed, and could I be blamed? With my parents constantly fighting with each other and myself in addition to pressuring me to get a job, the only person I considered a real friend gone, myself going to a school I'd only considered as an absolute fail-safe, watching everyone around me further reach their goals while I felt painfully still, I just gave up.
I wasn't living for myself. I was only living to get by. Every day blurred into another. I felt that there was nothing that I could do.
With all this going on, you have to understand that the little things like a journal comic had no importance to me.
But thankfully, I was wrong. And to see that, I needed somebody to show that to me. Needless to say, she did. This was somebody I'd opened up to before, but only about things I'd kept pent up until they meant nearly nothing to me, and when she helped me with those, her words fell on semi-deaf ears. But when I caved, when I decided there was nothing left to lose, when I acknowledged that I needed help, she said the things I needed to hear.
That day, I realized a lot of things. I realized that regardless of how I think and feel towards others, they're their own people and they think more of me than I think of them (cue HUGE jackass moment). I finally admitted to myself how much I really missed my best friend and that I wasn't nearly as independent of him as I thought. I learned that I needed to tell my parents how much stress they were putting me under and how much of an impact it was having on the quality of my life.
I was tired of the way I was living because it was no proper way to live, and I needed to change it for the better, if only for the sake of the person who was willing to help me when I thought no one would.
And I did. I made strides to become my own, fleshed out person. I came to abandon all of my past regrets, live for the present, and only have big dreams for the future, dreams I would never stop striving for. I'm my own person and my only limits are the ones I set for myself.
I learned that I do have real friends. They're friends that care about me, and even if they're not here beside me, or in front of me, they'll always be here inside of me, and as long as I remember that, I would never feel alone again.
I got a job, I kicked ass in my classes, I had fun, and for the first time in years (that is not an exaggeration) I was happy. And I was proud. I had finally managed to turn my life around and make the right start for the future.

...so where does this bring us?
Well, if you read all that, thanks for sticking through all the angst.
This comic was never my main endeavor. I never wanted it to be as big as Allan, Pages of Life, And-Id, or any of the other journal comics I read. I didn't need a cult following, and back in the day, the 3 or so readers I got were enough to keep me going. It wasn't for recognition, it was for fun. Sharing the fun (and sometimes not so fun) moments of my life for others to enjoy.
This was essentially my side-project. It me helped develop an artistic style (or several, really), taught me the tricks to art programs, and how to not compose comic pages.
And recently, when I tried to abide by the daily updates, it sometimes felt like a chore, and I don't want it to be a chore. I want it to be fun to do. I want to share the stories and the experiences I feel are worth sharing. I want to leave the bad, sappy, pity-party crap out. But considering how boring and routine my life has gotten, is it worth it? I thought about just leaving cold turkey. Who'd notice?
Apparently, a lot of people. I would look at the stats, and the number of unique visitors was anywhere from 10-30, and averaged about 21 or 22. It's nothing to write home about, but when I hadn't had a decent update for nearly 3 months and there were up to 30 people regularly checking in to see if there was something new, it really touched me. Here we are, complete strangers on the internet, and there are a small group of you who actually care enough to check this when Ohkam's Razor would have said there wasn't going to be an update.
So to all of you out there who regularly check Slice of Life, I want to give a heartfelt thank you.
So am I back? Well... Yes and no. Yes in that, following in what I want to do, there are some stories that I do want to share, and no in that there isn't going to be a consistent update schedule. Let's face it: I've never been good with consistency when it comes to Slice of Life. You don't expect it, and neither do I. In lieu of a schedule, I want to start popping out quality updates, much in the same vain as 1000 (that was an unsponsored plug; enjoy, Jacob~). Will they be that nice of quality? Don't count on it, but they'll be a huge step above where I'm at right now, and I'm hoping new and old readers alike are going to like that more than cookie-cutter formula I've been going with thus far.

So once again, thanks to everyone, whether you actually sat there and read all that, came as part of your daily check up, or you're a new reader who scrolled to the bottom of the page on accident! It's going to be a hell of a ride, so sit tight!